I'm sure you've all heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves. Well, here's my story.
My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick. The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine? Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans. And then the thieves struck again!
My nice flat tummy was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new gut with the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my new gut was attached at least 3 inches lower than my original. I realized that I'd have to give up jeans in favor of long skirts.
Two years ago, I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arms swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary - my body was being replaced one section at a time. What could they do next?
When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story. Women of the world, WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE! Those "plastic" surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts - stolen from you and me! The next time someone you know has something "lifted", look again - was it lifted from you?
THIS IS NOT A HOAX! This is happening to women everywhere, every night!
WARN YOUR FRIENDS!!!!
P.S. Last year I thought some one had stolen my boobs. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them tucked in my waistband for safekeeping!
Aaron is FINALLY finished!
3 days ago